I’m your doctor, not your soulmate

Okay, so I’m not sure about all of you, but I’m a little tired of this “match” service for finding a physician. I’ve never thought that finding a physician would be the equivalent of a “hook up” service. They have apps for that don’t they….”Tinder” anyone?

For that matter, I didn’t know you could “break up” with your physician! It is reassuring to know that there is a local healthcare organization willing to “help you out” when that happens! Perhaps the mental health and counseling services aren’t as sparse as I thought!

Since when did finding a “compatible” physician or “healthcare provider” become a dating service? As a potential new business, perhaps I should register the domain, www.patientsonly.com? Seems to be working for the farmers and “country-folk”. (by the way, as of today, the domain is available if anyone is looking for a business partern)

I didn’t know that being a doctor meant signing up for a meat-market lineup! By the way, were is the catwalk? I want to see what the latest in physician fashion is…are pumps back in style? How about hip-hugger, bell-bottoms? I think I might still have a powder-blue cumberbun kicking around…hope that will get me in the door!

Sure, everyone wants a physician who is nice, pleasant, good-looking, has a smashing smile, whose hours jive with my life (after all, isn’t that what all narcissistic Americans want anyway?), but to be honest, I’d trade all of that for one who is competent…one that spends time learning who I am and one how is willing to address more than one problem during a visit (it is hard to believe that there are offices in our area that limit office visits to 15 minutes…in some cases 7 minutes!). I’d like to have a doctor one who acknowledges our difference of opinions, but doesn’t kick me to the curb when we disagree (ie, no vaccinations…see yeah later!). A doctor who educates me on my healthcare options and is smart enough to think independently rather than following a “protocol” devised by a nameless committee comprised of folks who either aren’t doctors or haven’t laid eyes on a patient since the last century. That’s what I want and I suspect you do too.

By the way, I’m 6′, a tad over 200 pounds, enjoy obstacle course racing, driving with the top down, cruising in the open air on my Harley and beta testing new software. Plus I’m a dog lover and available after hours. So I guess I’m one of those bad-boy, atheletic, geek types. Looks like I have my bases covered. Can’t wait to see how many folks want to “match” with me!

Jack Forbush, DO

About Jack Forbush, DO

Dr. Jack Forbush is a private practice family physician in Hampden, ME providing comprehensive, cost-effective family medicine including obstetrics, pediatrics, women's and men's healthcare services, minor surgery and Osteopathic Manipulative Treatment. For more information about his direct care practice, visit www.ocfm.com, follow him on Twitter or check out the office’s Facebook page. Opinions expressed in this blog do not reflect those of any organization the author is associated with.